HandwashingRedux

I'm sorry. I wish I had more than headlines these days, but like my friend Mandy's (who was afraid of people with mental disabilities) Uncle said "Wish in one hand and shit in the other, then tell me which fills up faster". 

• Mandy lived in a trailer, like I did. Hers had alternating crucifixes and taxidermied stag heads throughout the living room. It was not inviting. In that home you did not mess with the bull, physically or spiritually.

• How I washed my hands to see you. There was a special method we had to learn. I saw Michael J Fox doing it on Scrubs. You were not washing, you were scrubbing - well in fact, I was scrubbing while you, well, you were just laying in a clear space ship with sphincter portholes throughout like if swiss cheese were water. They saved your life. You got to live. They took your sense of fine smell. It was a trade I am not sorry that we made, but you have lost out a bit.

• I would like to do a photo shoot where I mix up New England in Winter with the Caribbean in Winter and walk with snowshoes on the beach all bundled up, while snorkling in 3' of snow in short shorts.

• A peer of mine during our teen years was a foreign exchange student Tony Y. Tony ate his math book page by page in the lunchroom. The monitor shouted at him to stop and he preteneded like he didn't understand. Eric S. glued Jolly Rancher candy wrappers to his eyelids so that when he blinked, his eyes made a very loud crinkling sound.

• Every Pet has Stockholm Syndrome.

• Never mix up your bean pot with your chamber pot

• Children's story - The Ring Wraith that wanted to be a Good Guy

• I have known people who have died before we both knew any of the same other people. That is a lonely type of grief observed.

• Pat C Climb did a cover of Rump Shaker in 2026 to support WeMailCoconuts Money Dumpster.

• The Clown Joke isn't so much of a joke, as it is the story of a man and his lifelong obsession with retribution on a clown who belittled him when he was just a boy.